Where the hell did you come from?

I sat in shock today, with my may agape, as I read the press releases on a website called LaptopLobbyist.com. I was lead to the website by an article in the Philidelphia Weekly, detailing how a reporter for WHYY in Phildelphia, an NPR station I might add, was fired from her job for leaving these people a very nasty message on their answering machine, and accidentally leaving her work number as a return phone number. (Oops.) Well, they campaigned to have her fired from her job, despite the fact that she was not calling on the radio stations time, but her own. She did indeed get fired. This intrigued me... what sort of website has the power to get someone fired from their job because of something they did in their personal lives that should have had no effect on their job? So I went there... and, as I stated before, my jaw slackened with each paragraph until you could have driven a fully-loaded Mack truck into my esophagus.

Among other wonderful contributions to society, this website slings rhetoric that is so hyperbolic that it's laughable, and yet outragous. It's like listening to Rush Limbaugh talk, but without that hilarious inflection he has. *sigh* While I hate to reprint any of the ofal that they spew forth from their collective claptraps, I think that if any of these people involved in LaptopLobbyist.com gains any real power, we are all in some serious barney.

Conservative Activist Group Calls on Frist to Discipline Six
Who Voted Against Marriage Amendment

Christopher Carmouche -- Executive Director of Laptoplobbyist.com, a conservative activist group – is calling on Majority Leader Bill Frist to discipline the six Republicans who voted against the Federal Marriage Amendment by removing those who chair senate committees from their respective chairmanships. The six include Ben Nighthorse Campbell of Colorado, Lincoln Chafee of Rhode Island, Susan Collins of Maine, John McCain of Arizona, Olympia Snowe of Maine, and John Sununu of New Hampshire.

“The Republican leadership could only muster 48 votes on the Federal Marriage Amendment,” said Carmouche, “and three of those were Democrats. Republicans let the most liberal members of the Party chair their committees. That is a cruel betrayal of the folks who have supported the GOP in the belief that they were voting for conservative government. Bill Frist should see that these defectors are removed from positions of power – and he should do it right now – today. You can’t housebreak a dog if you wait to punish him until the week after he’s messed up the rug.”

Carmouche said that the Federal Marriage Amendment is one of the most crucial issues ever brought before the U.S. Senate. “The trashing of marriage that began in Massachusetts can’t be forced on other states. Opponents of this amendment know very well that the danger of that happening is very real. If the GOP leadership doesn’t discipline these people, a lot of social conservatives are going to stay home in November.”
[Some collection of douchebags]

I can contain myself no longer. Warning: Rant Approaching!

What the FUCK is wrong with you people? You don't punish somone for doing their job just because they disagree with you! God DAMNIT, you, Cardouche, represent everything that is horrible and dark and wrong about lobbyist groups in this country. I elect that we setup a dictatorship, simply to send people like this there, where they can have all the crazy laws they want, with no regard for the democratic process, and then, after all that, they can be shot in the head for disagreeing with the leader. Hows that for freedom for you, buddy? Huh? These Senators either a)had constituents who disagreed with the bill, or b)disagreed with the bill personally. Now, while I admit that B is not the way that a "good public representative" should act, they all do it. Left, Right, Up, Down, they all fucking do it, so who am I to go "Whelp, what a bunch of fucks." Hell, I'd do it too, and I sure as shit know that the pole-smoker Cardouche would do it. What kind of twisted person would run an organization that's sole reason for existence appears to be making it's employees and volunteers look like jingoistic facists? What the fuck? Oh, OH, my favorite part of his interview, and I quote:

"You can’t housebreak a dog if you wait to punish him until the week after he’s messed up the rug."

Smooth. Next time you want to shoot yourself in the foot with analogies, make sure you put your foot in your mouth first. Good God, I think that was the worst sentence I think I've ever heard come out of anyone's mouth, when use in reference to a political structure of which he is, apparently, wanting so badly to become. Well, listen here, choad-buffer, the day a fuck-smack like you has any sway over the political process is the day I have some fun with sleeping pills and booze, 'cause there's no place on Earth that would be safe. I'm a big fan of beatings, usually involving the skinny end of a fishing rod, or some rattan reeds, but I don't think that would do you any good. No, I think, perhaps, strapping you to a wheel-chair in the middle of downtown San Francisco might give you a bit of an eye-opener. Then the fishing rods will be yanked from their holsters, and you will be beaten, briskly, about the head and face... and then we'll let the gays have ya.

Okay, I feel (sorta) better now. Sorry you had to witness that. See you later. Bitches.