Unfinished Business

I have some unfinished business to attend to on this blog, if the title was not enough to tip you off to that fact. Someone has been holding out on me. Long have I begged for a simple task to be done from a so called "Friend" of mine. Long has he mocked my simple request with venom so spiteful that a pit of vipers would die from even a single drop. Long have my pleas for sanity and decency fallen upon the deaf ears of my fallen brother, while he twists the knife of ill-will in my gut. But now you, my loyal, wonderful readership can do something about this horrific injustice under which I have suffered far too long. Pick up your pens, pull out your paper, get those stamps from the back of the drawer, and write to the address below, and ask, in no polite terms, that the madness cease! You can address your letters to:

John L. Tetzlaff,
Jerk King of Assenstein
1492 Loch Jerk
Los Angeles, CA 90210

Plead for a cessation of the horrific assualts on your beloved Nate and demand that he buy me a GOD DAMNED BASS! Only you, John L. Tetzlaff, can end this horrid blight upon your soul. Stop this abhorrent rampage across the existence of mankind and buy me a damn bass. You cheap shit!


This message brought to you The John Tetzlaff Needs To Buy Me A Bass foundation, a division of Halla-Corp, makers of the famous Auto-Robotic Voice Time Machine. When you think "sleep disorder", think Halla-Corp.