Why don't we get it over with?

Seriously, the country has been headed in this direction since 9/11, so let's get on with it. We'll let the government do whatever the damn it pleases, let the citizens become total slathering governmental tools, and enable children to turn in their parents for "thought crimes". Then, we'll just put "War is Peace, Freedom is Slavery, Ignorance is Power" on all the governmental buildings, and the plan will be complete. Then Republicans and Democrats can come together and dance around the Maypole, whilst the citzenry of the United States fucks themselves with broomstick handles during the government-mandated "3 O'Clock Self-Sodimization to Please The Leader" sessions.

Here's a portion of an article from The Independent Florida Alligator that brought on this feeling of impending Orwellian totalitarianism:

Republicans on the House Choice and Innovation Committee voted along party lines Tuesday to pass a bill that aims to stamp out “leftist totalitarianism” by “dictator professors” in the classrooms of Florida’s universities.

The Academic Freedom Bill of Rights, sponsored by Rep. Dennis Baxley, R-Ocala, passed 8-to-2 despite strenuous objections from the only two Democrats on the committee.

The bill has two more committees to pass before it can be considered by the full House.

While promoting the bill Tuesday, Baxley said a university education should be more than “one biased view by the professor, who as a dictator controls the classroom,” as part of “a misuse of their platform to indoctrinate the next generation with their own views.”

Students who believe their professor is singling them out for “public ridicule” – for instance, when professors use the Socratic method to force students to explain their theories in class – would also be given the right to sue.

“Some professors say, ‘Evolution is a fact. I don’t want to hear about Intelligent Design (a creationist theory), and if you don’t like it, there’s the door,’” Baxley said, citing one example when he thought a student should sue.

But Baxley brushed off Gelber’s concerns. “Freedom is a dangerous thing, and you might be exposed to things you don’t want to hear,” he said. “Being a businessman, I found out you can be sued for anything. Besides, if students are being persecuted and ridiculed for their beliefs, I think they should be given standing to sue.”

During the committee hearing, Baxley cast opposition to his bill as “leftists” struggling against “mainstream society.”

“Professors are accountable for what they say or do,” he said. “They’re accountable to the rest of us in society … All of a sudden the faculty think they can do what they want and shut us out. Why is it so unheard of to say the professor shouldn’t be a dictator and control that room as their totalitarian niche?”

In an interview before the meeting, Baxley said “arrogant, elitist academics are swarming” to oppose the bill, and media reports misrepresented his intentions.

[The Independent Florida Alligator {Link}]

Alright... after I had read (and reread) this article, I sat in stunned silence for almost a full 2 minutes. Wha... wha happened? My head still reels from this article... and I think I'm going to be sick. First of all, who let this fuckwit into the Republican party? This is the kind of bullshit that would spew from some sort of tree-hugging liberal pot-smoker: "Everyone's opinions need to be respected, man, oh... and don't hurt the walruses, man." However, the sheer fact of the matter is this crap is coming out of a Republicans mouth because the education system is "inherently liberal" and Republicans are "inherently unstable". Dictator professors? It's their fucking class, asshole, and they need to keep your waterhead kid from acting like the stupid shit that he is, so of course there are going to be some rules, but college is DEFINITELY not a frigging Catholic grade-school, or some shit. You're not being told to shut-up and being put in the corner for expressing your ideas... no, you're being argued with. If I had a nickle for every PUBLIC arguement I had with a professor in class, I would be a very rich man. Hell, I've gotten through entire classes based soley on the fact that I would argue with the professor until we were both blue in the face. At the end of the day, it came to this: I respect the fact that they have their own opinions, even though I may disagree with them, and they do the same damn thing. Hell, I used to go into a few professor's offices and argue with them out of class, as well.

Whatever, I'm getting off-topic. Here's what it really comes down to: Kids are in school to learn. Most kids, when they get to college, have no idea what's going on around them, whats going on in their heads, etc. College is not only the dump point of cold, hard facts into one's brains, but it also is where a lot of people develop their personalities//self-respect/drug-problems. So, what the fuck? So some professor gives me shit if I believe in Creationism instead of Evolution. It's MY problem if I want to make more of an issue out of it than "Oh... well, it'll be interesting to learn things from the other side for a bit... and maybe I can get at the professor on a few points." If I want to be all uppity about it, then I'm the fuckhead who needs a bit of readjusting.

"'Freedom is a dangerous thing, and you might be exposed to things you don’t want to hear,' [Baxely] said." Wow... that is, possibly, one of the, if not the stupidest things I've ever heard, and I drink in a town populated by one-toothed hicks, where the double negatives rule. Freedom is a dangerous thing, eh? Yeah, dangerous for those that are in power in a Democratic Republic such as ours, because the people who put them there are free to figure out that the people they elected are nothing more than a bunch of grandma-fucking guttersnipes with their hands in everyone's pockets, and their dicks in everyone's stew-pots. Fucking pathetic ass-smacks. On another note, I am horrified by all this "protection of ideas" that's been going around lately; the idea that I may deem something "offensive and dangerous to society" because I don't agree with it. What the fuck is this shit? With every arguement, there are at least two sides. Not knowing what the other side of the arguement is ignorance and not wanting to know the other side is unexcusably vapid ignorance. People who practice this method of securing their own shakey beliefs by not challenging them should be loaded into gigantic circus cannons and fired into large buildings at high speeds for the entertainment of others. Seriously, if you can't deal with having your beliefs challanged by others, then you have no place in society. Take this, for instance: I was a practicing Roman Catholic for a few of my adult years. (For my, my adult years began at age 12 or 13, when I was able to begin to rationalize things for myself and stop simply accepting what others told me.) During my active church attendance, I found myself asking many questions about the religion that the curch officials could not answer to my satisfaction or simply refused to answer. The Bible had nothing, as it is simply a large collection of allegorical tales, nor did the Catechism, a kind of Catholic "rule book" that deals much more with the present situation of the church. Those that chose to answer my questions, priests, bishops, Catholic school teachers, with the exception of my college professors at a later time, became very defensive when I challeneged their beliefs, and chose to treat me in the conversation as a silly child, rather than a party interested in some very adult answers. Thats what spoiled me on Catholicism... only later, through my studies of other religions in college did I form a disdain for all major organized religions. The point of the story, though, is that I held beliefs... and then questioned them myself, and sought out answers to my questions. When I made others question their own beliefs with my points, they became very hostile, despite the fact that I wasn't attempting to change their beliefs, but solidify mine. In the end, I came to the ultimately satisfactory answer that organized religion is bullshit, but nescessary bullshit for some. When someone makes me question my own beliefs, there are only two eventual endings: my beliefs change, or they are further solidified. If you can't handle this situation, then your beliefs are not worthwhile, and you are most likely a useless human being, who will end up getting elected by all the other useless human beings into some high office where you can ruthlessly fuck those that disagree with you. Congratulations, Baxely, you've found your first thought-criminal. Now go fuck yourself.

School Funding... again

Now, dear readers, I would like to talk about that steams my clam every time it comes up. School funding. Seriously... why are you people fucking about with this? Here in the wonderful town of Harvard, we have had a referendum come up for vote every election period for the past four or five years, and people keep voting it down... and that steams me up past the point of comprehension. Now, in this particular community, it is more than JUST a taxation issue, which the opposition would lead you to believe is the entire reason they oppose the bill. It's not... there are racial issues as well, which just makes me sick in the gills. Anyway, the people of Harvard have been embroiled in this battle for several years, with the old (65+) and ignorant on one side (fairly large portion), and the young and "educated" on the other. (Education goes a long way out here... but... well, I won't open that can right now.) Everyone argues about taxes and funding and misappropriation of funds and extra-curricular programs and blah blah blah shut it. Here's my argument, that goes for all school funding issues ever:

What is there to fucking argue about?

I have my own personal issues with the school system (public and private) but almost all of my very good friends went through the system, and every last one of them is fucking brilliant, so it's not a total loss... it does it's job. Anyway, back to the main point... what the fuck is wrong with you people? Seriously, if you want your kids to be fucking idiots, don't send them to school at all, just keep 'em home, let 'em play all the fuck video-games they want and stare at the fucking tube all day. Yeah! What THE FUCK? SCHOOL! EDUCATION! GOOD! Why do I have to get UPSET ABOUT THIS SHIT?!? You fucking people who vote this shit down, you should be ashamed of yourselves! HELLO! These kids are going to be running the FUCKING WORLD some day, and I want them as absolutely prepared as possible! I don't want some shit blowing up because Timmy didn't know to carry the Y. FUCK!

Okay, I've taken a deep breath... and now I'll try to be a bit more civil about this. Okay, to be fair, they're only talking about eliminating extra-curricular activities if the referendum fails to pass... things like football, basketball, wrestling, jazz band, concert band, etc. Now, I don't feel real strongly about sports in school, because I think they take away from the academic aspect, but then, I'm not a sportsman. (Too many rules to all these sports. Just gimme the ball and lemme beat the shit outta that guy) However, being a musician and a (private) music teacher, I abhor the thought of music being eliminated from the curriculum of any school. I WANT kids exposed to Liszt, Mozart, Haydn and Berlioz. I WANT them to squirm in their seats when they listen to Scriabin or Coltrane. I WANT them to be able to dance to Basie, Ellington and Satchmo. Not only that, but I want them to read things "that they aren't supposed to read" like Catcher In The Rye, Uncle Tom's Cabin, The Dialogues of Plato, The Communist Manifesto. I WANT kids that are familiar with The US Constitution and the Bill of Rights... kids that know why we have to keep fighting for them at all costs, even at some times, against our own government. I WANT kids that are turned on by the education process because it's fun, not turned off because it's lackluster and forced... and, I'm willing to pay for it. I'm willing to pay a good chunk of my hard-earned money every year so that kids come out of school with passion and fire in their bellies, not dull eyes from being lead about in a dull, authoritarian setting. I'll pay... for my (future) kids, your kids, the hispanic guy down the street's kids, the black guy across the way's kids. I don't care what color, religion or economic bracket you are, I want your kids to learn. They need to learn ALL THEY CAN, because life is a mutherfucker, and they need to be prepared. Unfortunately, we live in a society that doesn't punish the stupid, but rewards them... *COUGH*PresidentBush*COUGH* ...but that doesn't mean that every kid that comes out of the school system shouldn't be prepared for the next round. Seriously. Don't agree with me? Fuck you.

Now... I mentioned a tax hike, which just gets some people bent nine ways to Tuesday... well, fuck off. If you own a $200,000 house in Harvard, the tax hike would cost you in the area of $375 dollars (high estimate) extra a year. Almost a dollar a day... you cheap fuck-nockers. You could buy a Little Ceasers "pizza" once a week for a year... or you could make sure that your child and the other children in his or her school get a better education. If you're even considering the "pizza", go fuck yourself with a bus exhaust pipe, would you? Holy fuck, why? I pray to every god that exists in every religion and ask that there be some sort of cosmic justice for greedy pig-fuckers like that. Shit, if I can't convince you (which I probably will not, seeing as you are probably too ignorant to get passed some of the words on this page), maybe being hollowed-out and used as a prophylactic for the thorny-cocked Gulthub the Rampant in an afterlife will be a suitable measure to let you know that you fucked up. But it probably won't be. Fuck.

Some argue that the money is being mis-spent, that it's doing nothing but lining the pockets of the administration. That is a problem, yes. I agree that anyone that takes a six figure salary for being an administrator at a school should have a fish-fork forcibly shoved up their noses and stabbed in the eyes with mechanical pencil leads. TEACHERS deserve that kind of money, not administrators... but does that mean that all the money that goes to the school gets intercepted by these scum-fucking douche-suckers? No. No it does not. I think I might try and get elected to the school board so that I can keep an eye on these motherfuckers... but I'll still give the school money. Lots of money. Wait... you don't want to give them a few hundred dollars more a year? Well... kiss my ass, you rotten mother-fuckers. I hope your kids turn out smarter than you... but they probably won't... which is just fucking sad.

Terry Schiavo...

Why is this a matter of national urgency? Why? This should be between Schiavo's parents and her husband and THAT'S IT. It's none of our fucking business whether this poor woman lives or dies. Why the hell do you care? Over 40,000 people die in car accidents every year... That's about 110 people A DAY. Five kids were just shot in a Minnesota school, and while there is an outcry, it's a drop in the bucket compared to the crap this woman is getting. What the FUCK? What the hell is wrong with you people?!? Do you know how many people die EVERY DAY of AIDS in Africa? Around 3,200... every FUCKING day the population of a small town in the United States is wiped out by AIDS... we're not even accounting for starvation of genocide here, people. So why do we care so much about Terry Schiavo's last few fucking days as a fucking vegetable and not about the suffering people all around the world? Cause they're the wrong color, religion, live in the wrong country, etc. Yeah, that's the fucking reason, and don't fucking argue with me about that shit. You fucking people disgust me, and I seriously HOPE that there is a hell, so that somewhere there is an eternal punishment waiting for all your ass-gorging fucksticks. (Me too, but I'm already secure in the belief that my existence in any afterlife is fucked.)

I was talking to someone about the Schiavo case a few months ago, back when it was barely a blip on the radar of the igno-fucking-rant public, and they got all high and mighty on me, and started lording (pun intended) their religion over me. God this and Jesus that and blah-blah-yakety-smackety. At the end of his rant, my rebuttal went something like this:

"Dude, you're a fucking dumb-shit, you know that?"

Seriously. What the fuck? I don't mind religion so much, when it doesn't bug me. If it doesn't fuck with me, I don't fuck with it... but that isn't the case these days. There has been a huge "religious reawakening" in this country of ours, which frightens me. I'm not a big fan of organized religion, although I understand the need that some people have for it. I would prefer spirituality without religion, but seeing as 51% of this country is ignorant enough to vote Bush back into office, I doubt the concept would be understood. Anyway, the religious right (and left) have gotten their various religions (mostly Christianity... one of the most murderous of religions) into the forefront of United States culture, and I, for one, am horrified. The last person I want leading the country in which I live, running my state government, being in ANY position of power is some fucking religious zealot who's going to do what a 2,000+ year old book told him/her blindly, just because it was written by a bunch of nutters who supposedly talked to God or his son. If I came about with an idea like that now, say just popped into the local post-office and said "Hey there, I'd like four dollars worth of stamps, and oh, would you be interested in joining my religion? God spoke to me last night in the form of a burning deciduous shrubbery and told me to go around being a general pain in the ass in his name," they'd call me a looney and lock me away. Anyway, this is turning into a general rant about religion, and I don't want it to be that, so let's get back to the matter at hand:

Remove Terry's feeding tube and see how long she lives.

We've seen she can "live" (if you can call it that) 15+ years with a feeding tube thus far, and a good while longer, I can bet. Pull that feeding tube out and see how long she lasts. That should be a good, natural indicator. Can't feed herself? Whelp, guess that kinda fucks that, doesn't it? Hell, I'll go one up: we'll build a robotic arm to make a sandwich, hold it up to her mouth, and wire her jaw to take a bite of the sandwich. What, she cant chew or swallow? Then WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING KEEPING HER ALIVE? Look... Humans have this thing called "Will for Survival," wherein, I will fight, till I'm knocked unconscious or killed, to keep myself alive. Every human has this. Every last one, you, me, your mom, Rush Limbaugh (if he's human), the Pope, everyone. If I were knocked unconscious, and woke up, and I had lost that "Will for Survival," I have lost me will to live, and am awaiting death to release me from my hell. If you can't fend for yourself, it's alright to have someone else fend for you for a bit, until you can start fending for yourself again... but not for FIFTEEN FUCKING YEARS. C'mon people, what the FUCK is wrong with you? Her parents are truly horrible parents. They will let their little girl "suffer" (although, I'm fairly sure she can't feel or think a damn thing) just so that they don't have to mourn her loss... or because of an infinitesimally small chance that she could recover. (I have a better chance of becoming a hardcore, right-wing Baptist preacher... and that ain't gonna happen.) Come to think of it, Schiavo has a better chance of having a meteor "kill" her in her hospital bed than she has of any recovery. Alright, I'm ranting a bit, but here's my main point:

If you really care about Terry... let her go.

Seriously, if I was in that position... I wouldn't be, because my family or friends would have pulled LS from me as soon as my cerebral cortex melted away. So I don't get why everyone is fighting to keep this woman alive... you don't think her husband cries himself to sleep at night every God-damned day because he can't say goodbye to his brain-dead wife once and for all? My heart goes out to that poor man, and I hope that he can reach an accord with Schaivo's parents before this becomes an overgrown national matter and he gets accused of being a murderer... oh, fuck, that's what's happening now, all because the religious zealots out there can't play with their own nuts like everyone else. Fuck the Republicans, fuck the Democrats, fuck the religious fuckwits, fuck them all... and if you don't agree with me, fuck you too.

On a side note, here's something that P.W. Stark has at the top of his blog, SyrupyPop [Link]:

"Historically, the best way to convert liberals is to have them move out of their parents' home, get a job, and start paying taxes. But if this doesn't work, you might have to actually argue with a liberal." - Ann Coulter

No, the only way to convert a "liberal" into a hating fuck-monger like yourself, Ms. Coulter, is to surround him with callous, heartless, loud-mouthed individuals every day of his life. Every time he falls to his knees and weeps to the cold, indifferent sky, crying out for any sort of justice, cosmic or terrestrial, he will lose a bit of himself. When, finally, all is lost, and no more tears will be shed; when all that is left is the cold, heartless shell of man, a mere shadow of humanity; when the blood in his veins has cooled to steel, and his brain filled with inexplicable explanations for the horrendous suffering of the world, the transition is complete. When you have finally snuffed out the flame of independent thought, and reasoning as a solution, you have won. You may have your victory, and claim your lifeless spoils, for they are no longer alive... they simply exist.

I hate Democrats and I hate Republicans... neither has the fire... they both simply exist. Disagree with me? Grow a pair and leave a comment. Have a nice day.

Who lets these people out?

When I want to get really steamed up, I just head on over to Syrupy Pop [Link], run by one Paul W. Stark, whom I'm sure is a decent person, and is not brain-washed by the religion (Christian) which he practices. *AHEM* Usually upon reading his blog, the first words out of my mouth involve some unitelligble, guttural noises, followed by a loud "What?!?" Rather than rant a bit about this, I'd rather have a look at a few points he makes, make a few counter-arguements, and then rant for a bit. Let's begin.

"U.N. "peacekeepers"? Hardly. It appears these "peacekeepers" do all sorts of terrible things - and America should be upset that we provide such a large share of the U.N.'s budget."

He is, of course, referring to incidents which have taken place between U.N. Peacekeepers and residents of The Democratic Republic of Congo. There have been around 150 cases of misconduct reported, the most serious of those cases involving rape, pedophilia and prostitution. Now, I admit, that's no good, and the perps should be punished with expediency. However, the most serious cases were also the rarest... and who the hell are you to get all high and mighty? You support a president who was in office during the abuse of prisoners at Abu Ghraib and the unlawful (and undemocratic) retention of "combatants" at Guantanamo Bay. Stack that on top of a war that was entered under false (perjurous, if you ask me) pretenses, and the destablization and abandonment of Afghanistan, and I think your high-horse should be five feet below sea level.

"It seems pretty up in the air as to whether the president will be able to implement social security reform. Doing so, and restoring a bit of economic liberty to the people, would be huge."

Social Security doesn't need to be reformed right now. The budget needs to be balanced right now, the deficit needs to be lowered right now, we need to get our troops out of the Middle East before Shrub decides to just occupy the whole damn region right now. Social Security reform is the least of my worries. The Monkey is trying to push it through so he can get s'more thumbs-up from Big Business, who have nothing but gain coming their way from this plan, and also so that his 8 years in office don't look like a huge smoking crater of pig-shit to future generations. (Honestly, there's really nothing he can do about that.) Relax on the SS issue, it's not THAT important right now. Focus on getting this country on the right track first.

"Terri Schiavo is still alive, for now. You know our society has serious problems when it's on the verge of allowing an estranged husband to starve his disabled wife to death. Everything possible must be done to prevent her murder."

Yes, you know your society has a serious problem when it doesn't allow nature to do what it should have been allowed to do 7 years prior simply because a book says they shouldn't. For those who aren't familiar... read a newspaper, would you? Anyway, Terri Schiavo had a massize heart-attack 15 years ago, and died, but was resuscitated. Due to the heart attack and resuscitation, she suffered severe brain damage. As time passed, the damage worsened, and now most of her cerebral cortex has disintegrated. The cerebral cortex, for those who don't know, is the part of the brain that handles language, perceptual awarness, "thinking" and memory, among others. In other words, this poor woman has been reduced to the mental state of a vegetable. She has a feeding tube inserted into her stomach, because she can't be fed through her throat. Her husband believes that she would not want to live this way, and is attempting to have the feeding tube removed, while her parents are doing everything to keep her alive. It's a tragic battle, and one that is very heated, but let me just say this: If I get brain-panned or the like, don't keep me alive. I don't want to be around simply to eat and shit. Thats not a life, thats hell and anyone that knows anything about human decency would know that it would be time to let me die, not to torture me in order to fill-in for your inability to grieve. Let it go. That's all I'm going to say.

"Wow. I think American foreign policy is having some influence. First, we get upset about the lack of democracy in Egypt. Then Egypt decides to become more democratic. We'll see how everything turns out."

Yeah. Guess they didn't want to be bombed into a democracy like the other two countries we've converted, huh? Wow. Smart move, Egypt, 'cause I was getting ready to paint clever sayings on the bombs, like "Vote or Die", "Carpet Bombing for Democracy" and "If You Can Read This, You Should Have Voted, But Your Life Is Forfiet To Democracy Now." 'T would've been great.

" A brief analysis of George W. Bush's presidency:

After 9/11, excellent foreign policy. Truly heroic, world changing, and necessary.

Good judicial nominations and a solid record on social issues."

Wow. I don't know where you are getting your LSD from, buddy, but you should lay off before you start seeing Dick Cheney prancing around with the Pope in a field of daisies while God plays "What A Day For A Daydream" on a ukulele. Woof. George Bush's presidency can be summed up in one word. Clusterfuck. Thank you and good night.

"America's bold foreign policy - opposing regimes that oppress their people and supporting the revolutionaries that will fight for their human rights - is taking hold."

Yes, United States! Way to go! Put that Huessein in power, help out that Ayatollah Khomeini, support that Mihn! Make deals with those horrific human rights violator: China and Saudi Arabia. They oppress their people in a GOOD way... a way which is financially positive for us! Huzzah! Oh, and poo-poo and pishaw the fact that the United States has a human rights record that is fairly dismal as well, from the mistreatment of "miltary detainees" to the starving masses of poor that the government refuses to acknowledge. That won't dampen war-march of democracy! No sir!

In closing, I would like to say to Mr. Stark: You make my brain hurt. I have no idea how you can go to sleep at night, but I do know this. Don't be scared to have an opinion of your own. Oh, and that article you had up about "Feelings" and libereal political beliefs? Yeah, kiss my ass. If you don't have feelings, I don't want you doing anything related to my governing, because I want someone who knows when enough is enough. Then again... if it keeps going the way it has been in this country, I won't ever have to vote again. King Pachyderm will do it for me.

Alright Canada!

I just picked this up off of BoingBoing.net [Link], and wanted to share it with the (small) readership of this blog. I'm a big fan of violent language and hyperbole, but I also have the ability to calm down and enter into an intelligent debate. The Canadians, however, Lloyd Axworthy in particular, like to use non-licentious language while delivering their payload of acerbic points. Read this open letter from Mr. Axworthy to Conilezza Rice, our "illustrious" Secretary of State.

Dear Condi, I'm glad you've decided to get over your fit of pique and venture north to visit your closest neighbour. It's a chance to learn a thing or two. Maybe more.

I know it seems improbable to your divinely guided master in the White House that mere mortals might disagree with participating in a missile-defence system that has failed in its last three tests, even though the tests themselves were carefully rigged to show results.

But, gosh, we folks above the 49th parallel are somewhat cautious types who can't quite see laying down billions of dollars in a three-dud poker game.

As our erstwhile Prairie-born and bred (and therefore prudent) finance minister pointed out in presenting his recent budget, we've had eight years of balanced or surplus financial accounts. If we're going to spend money, Mr. Goodale added, it will be on day-care and health programs, and even on more foreign aid and improved defence.

Sure, that doesn't match the gargantuan, multi-billion-dollar deficits that your government blithely runs up fighting a "liberation war" in Iraq, laying out more than half of all weapons expenditures in the world, and giving massive tax breaks to the top one per cent of your population while cutting food programs for poor children.

Just chalk that up to a different sense of priorities about what a national government's role should be when there isn't a prevailing mood of manifest destiny.
Coming to Ottawa might also expose you to a parliamentary system that has a thing called question period every day, where those in the executive are held accountable by an opposition for their actions, and where demands for public debate on important topics such a missile defence can be made openly.

You might also notice that it's a system in which the governing party's caucus members are not afraid to tell their leader that their constituents don't want to follow the ideological, perhaps teleological, fantasies of Canada's continental co-inhabitant. And that this leader actually listens to such representations.

Your boss did not avail himself of a similar opportunity to visit our House of Commons during his visit, fearing, it seems, that there might be some signs of dissent. He preferred to issue his diktat on missile defence in front of a highly controlled, pre-selected audience.

Such control-freak antics may work in the virtual one-party state that now prevails in Washington. But in Canada we have a residual belief that politicians should be subject to a few checks and balances, an idea that your country once espoused before the days of empire.

If you want to have us consider your proposals and positions, present them in a proper way, through serious discussion across the table in our cabinet room, as your previous president did when he visited Ottawa. And don't embarrass our prime minister by lobbing a verbal missile at him while he sits on a public stage, with no chance to respond.

Now, I understand that there may have been some miscalculations in Washington based on faulty advice from your resident governor of the "northern territories," Ambassador Cellucci. But you should know by now that he hasn't really won the hearts and minds of most Canadians through his attempts to browbeat and command our allegiance to U.S. policies.
Sadly, Mr. Cellucci has been far too closeted with exclusive groups of 'experts' from Calgary think-tanks and neo-con lobbyists at cross-border conferences to remotely grasp a cross-section of Canadian attitudes (nor American ones, for that matter).

I invite you to expand the narrow perspective that seems to inform your opinions of Canada by ranging far wider in your reach of contacts and discussions. You would find that what is rising in Canada is not so much anti-Americanism, as claimed by your and our right-wing commentators, but fundamental disagreements with certain policies of your government. You would see that rather than just reacting to events by drawing on old conventional wisdoms, many Canadians are trying to think our way through to some ideas that can be helpful in building a more secure world.

These Canadians believe that security can be achieved through well-modulated efforts to protect the rights of people, not just nation-states.

To encourage and advance international co-operation on managing the risk of climate change, they believe that we need agreements like Kyoto.

To protect people against international crimes like genocide and ethnic cleansing, they support new institutions like the International Criminal Court -- which, by the way, you might strongly consider using to hold accountable those committing atrocities today in Darfur, Sudan.

And these Canadians believe that the United Nations should indeed be reformed -- beginning with an agreement to get rid of the veto held by the major powers over humanitarian interventions to stop violence and predatory practices.

On this score, you might want to explore the concept of the 'Responsibility to Protect' while you're in Ottawa. It's a Canadian idea born out of the recent experience of Kosovo and informed by the many horrific examples of inhumanity over the last half-century. Many Canadians feel it has a lot more relevance to providing real human security in the world than missile defence ever will.

This is not just some quirky notion concocted in our long winter nights, by the way. It seems to have appeal for many in your own country, if not the editorialists at the Wall Street Journal or Rush Limbaugh. As I discovered recently while giving a series of lectures in southern California, there is keen interest in how the U.S. can offer real leadership in managing global challenges of disease, natural calamities and conflict, other than by military means.

There is also a very strong awareness on both sides of the border of how vital Canada is to the U.S. as a partner in North America. We supply copious amounts of oil and natural gas to your country, our respective trade is the world's largest in volume, and we are increasingly bound together by common concerns over depletion of resources, especially very scarce fresh water.
Why not discuss these issues with Canadians who understand them, and seek out ways to better cooperate in areas where we agree -- and agree to respect each other's views when we disagree.

Above all, ignore the Cassandras who deride the state of our relations because of one missile-defence decision. Accept that, as a friend on your border, we will offer a different, independent point of view. And that there are times when truth must speak to power.

In friendship,

Lloyd Axworthy
[Winnipeg Free Press]

Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant. Promote that man.

Copyright Laws, Software Patents, and Piracy

First, I would like to congratulate the MPAA. They have finally given those low-down, dirty copyright-infringing bastards what they deserve when Russell Sprague, of Homewood, IL, died in his jail cell while awaiting sentencing for illegally copying and distributing movies being screened for Oscar picks [Story]. He could have been sentenced up to 3 years in jail on one count of copyright infringment, or nearly the time he would have spent in jail for criminal sexual assault in the State of Illnois. That makes a lot of sense, since the "crime" of copying a movie is so close to that of violently sexually-violating a person in many respects. Nice Job, Dan Glickman... you're officially a cock-knocking chipmunk-fucker. I hope you're happy with yourself, happy with sending a man to his death to "preserve" your bottom line. Why the hell not, eh? The president does it all the time. Dick.

Looks like software patents might be coming back in Europe, thanks to Bill Gates and his slushing of peoples funds. The European Comission has declined to restart the software patents debate from the beginning, against the demands of the European Parliment. Wonderful. Thanks, Billy. Between threatening the Danes with removing 800 tech jobs and bribing members of the EC, pretty soon the whole world will be running shit-tank software. Huzzah!

Think software patents are a good idea? You are misinformed. Read the info contained at NoSoftwarePatents.com [Link] Read it and still think they're a good idea? Then you're either an idiot or a dickwad, and I don't really care which. Blow off.

Look out, now. Someone has dug up the fact that Happy Birthday is still copyrighted, and public performances of it are copyright enfringment. UnhappyBirthday.com [Link] is either run by a group of emphatic wackos, or a wondeful gang of tounge-in-cheek humorists. Either way, it brings up a good point, and calls for the cessation of selective copyright enforcement, by way of enforcing the copyright on Happy Birthday. Oh, and Warner Brothers music and movies divisions... I have something for you:

Here's something for Bill Gates, Dan Glickman, and all those that support all this bullshit:

Me, flipping you off. Enjoy.

Thats right, eat my balls and die, you software-patent-loving, copywrong-enforcing, inoccent-man-mudering bags of leper-shit. I hope to one day to meet you wastes of skin and blood, and bury you up to your necks in sand. Then, I'll let all the people you've wronged with your money-grubbing cock-sucklery take turns giving you small cuts with bamboo shoots, that will slowly fester and rot. Only in your last hours will you slowly begin to realize that if you had just been less of a fuck-stick, you would have been respected. Way to be a bunch of douche-nozzles.

Nice job.